My Love?
by Sesshomaru'sPersonalFanGirl
Summary: When did love get so complicated? Especially in a small village like Kardia? Raguna is about to find out!
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1: A Really Bad Nightmare?

Raguna was wondering throught the village of Kardia. The weather was a bright, sunny day. He'd smile, weather was always good on days like this, when a festival was going, especially on the Spring Festival. This was the one time of in this month of year the ladies of the village were excited. They would receive tons of cookies from the guys that were interested in them. Every year it was the same for him though, he had never baked a single cookie for any of the bachelorettes for this day. He had the recipe and was a fairly good cook, but he had his reasons for doing so. Despite that, it didn't seem to bother the girls, though. For some reason, unknown to him, all the girls, except for Mist, most recently, would give him chocolate as presents for the Winter Festival. Mist was the only one he trusted with his secret.

Raguna stopped walking once he reached the park. There were were a few others there, but they seemed invisible to him. He was filled with all these thoughts. He would take in a deep breath and let out a soft a sigh. Everything was so much more calming here. A slight tap on his shoulder would snap him out of his partial comfort and make him jump a little. He glanced around quickly, he then noticed Felicity, a smile would be present on her face. A small, weak smile appeared on his face.

Felicity was a kind, young lady, and the mayor's daughter. Raguna's first year here, he had cured her from the illness that had plagued her. It was simple, really. He had taken the stone that Ceci had given her and turned it over to Edward. Since then, she looked so bright, so vibrant, so full of life.

Normally, she would be found infront of her house on the Spring Festival, but she must have decided to seek him out personally. What did she expect anyway, she should know that he had no cookies for her or anyone, for that matter. Felicity then said the same thing she said every year, "Do you have a special girl to give some cookies to?" His smile grew grim at that question, did she really expect such a thing from him? What would make this year any different from all the others? Why he even bothered to leave his house on this festival was a mystery to even him. "Uh... no..." would be Raguna's hesitantly mumbled answer.

She wouldn't know, so... he shouldn't be worried, besides she'd probably just dismiss it as him being too busy. That thought was the only thing keeping him calm. "well, you shouldn't over-work yourself, you have to keep yourself in good health for the upcoming festivals, like the Egg Show and the Cook-off," she'd say, keeping the bright smile on her face. It was creeping him out a bit, and she was starting to sound like Lara, telling him to be careful, take breaks, whatever. It wasn't like he wasn't grateful and all fro being able to be accepted in this village so easily, but the girls started to sound a tad pushy, in his opinion, anyway. "Um... yeah... I'll be sure to take good care of myself," Raguna replied after a while, hoping that this conversation was over, then thought to himself, "Coming from the girl that kept a cursed stone, that means a lot, I should really consider this." He wasn't entirely sure with himself on whether that thought was meant to be sarcasm or he should really put it to heart, it just seemed to pop up, out of nowhere. It was extremely random, and because of that, he wasn't sure what to make of it.

Either way, he'd let out a sigh, he wasn't always so cross, but every year, he grew more neverous about his secret being leaked and... The village. What would they say? What would they think? Could he really be a part of them if they knew the truth?

Felicity's smile quickly turned to a frown. She couldn't help, but feel like it was all her fault that Raguna seemed so down. She'd pat him on the shoulder. He was pulled out of his thoughts. I'll see you later!" she shouted, as she sprinted off to her house again. Maybe he should bake cookies, to make things seem normal. It was just... how could he give presents to a girl or girls he had no interest in? This was sure turning into a great big heap of mess for him. He was confused and so unsure of what to do. He ran his fingers through his hair, it was so vexing. He decided that even if he had no feelings for any of the females here, h would still be courtious enough to give at least one cookie to each one of the girls. He marched back to his house with a new found confidence, he at the very least owed them some apprication for being so kind.

As he reached his house, he noticed Lynette roaming around on his farm. Strange, on Festivals, she never came out of Mist's house, something about not liking the loud noise. So... what exactly was she doing...? Was she... looking for something? Perhaps she lost something? He figured she would probably be gone when he came back out, so it wasn most likely just nothing. Raguna entered his house, he slowly made his way to the kitchen. There wasn't any rush, besides, it ws good to keep others in suspense. He flipped a few pages in his oven cookbook, he viewed over the ingredients needed before heading toward his fridge. He would stack the ingredients in his free arm, then used both to hold on to the items, and started closing the fridge with one of his feet. He then carried everything to the free space of a counter. He placed it down, then up in the cabinets for a big, clean bowl for the mixing. He reached up and grabbed one and placed it next to the items.

Raguna began to dig through the drawers for a spoon, when he cound one, he threw it into the bowl, without much thought, and looked over the recipe again. He memorized every detail as he opened the bags of flour, dumping them all in. He was about to put the butter in, then he realized he didn't take the spoon out of the bowl, he went rummaging through flour in the bowl. The end result was lots of patches of white everywhere. On the counter, on his clothes, on the floor, his hands, hice face, it was just everywhere. If someone else were there, they'd probably mistake him for a ghost, a patchy ghost, but still a ghost. At least the soon was in his hand, so it wasn't that bad. He would just have to cleam up before he left, lest he desired to make a fool of himself. He'd need more flour now, though. He lazily walked over to the fridge again, running a floury hand through his flour patched hair.

This was seeming to become a hassle. Honestly, if he were actually interested, he probably wouldn't have been so absent-minded when doing this. He opened the fridge door, making the handle cover in flour prints. He took some more bags out, carrying them back to the counter, and closing the the door with his foot, once more, making a flour shoe print on the bottom of the door. He went back to counter. This time being extra careful. He didn't need any more messes to clean up today.

After a couple of hours, a cleaner kitchen and himself, and a ding from his oven later, he'd bag up the cookies. As he reached one, he burnt his hand slightly. He blew on his hand lightly. They were extremely hot. He sighed, what was he doing? He couldn't believe he was actually going to go through with this. The negativeness seemed to melt away as he smelt the freshly baked cookies. He always had a soft spot for sugar. He was almost tempted to eat one of them, but that'd be mean, since he had only made enough for the girls... and Ceci. That little girl always seemed to brighten the mood with her smile, she definitely deserved some thanks. Besides, it might actually encourage Nicholas to give her some, since in the previous years, he had admitted that he was too embarrassed to.

After everything was ready, he left his house. Just as he had predicted, Lynette was nowhere in sight. He shrugged it off and headed to the village. He put on a smile and handed out cookies. Things seemed to be going smoothly. He was handing the last of his cookies out to Bianca and Tabatha, it didn't seem quiet in the park anymore. What was going on...? He could make out faint murmurings. That's when things seemed to take a turn to a dark atmosphere. Then it was as if he was being crowded, but he couldn't make out the faces of anyone... he was sure it was the villagers, though, because it definitely sounded like them. What was happening? Suddenly, he could see Godwin's face. His face was grim, almost demonic. "You're really--" Godwin would say. Raguna was confused, part of it seemed to be blocked out, he was what? Then it hit him, his secret... that was what he was. The villagers seemed to chant what Godwin had said. Raguna had to cover his ears to try and block it all out, but it didn't seem to help. "No... I... it's not like that! I'm--" he yelled.

Raguna sat up in his bed, drenched in sweat. That dream... that nightmare, it always seemed reoccur, just to mock him, to make him realize that maybe he wasn't better suited to live here. He sighed deeply, holding a his head with one of his hands, then reluctantly went back to his unpleasant slumber.

Okay, so it's my first story. Comment please! Oh, and try to keep it constructive, 'kays? Thanks. :D 


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2: ...I need to do _what_ now?

Raguna had woken up his usual time. Despite his nagging nightmare. The season was actually Fall... far away from Spring. Why it was even Spring in his dream eluded him, but it wasn't as if the season mattered, it was what always happened that seemed to bother him. He was watering his crops, completely absorbed into something else altogether. It was hard trying to deal with things alone... he needed to really have someone to consult to... besides, Mist. It wasn't like she didn't listen, but only telling one person wasn't helping him. Finally, he realized that he wasn't even watering any of his crops... but just some untilled land. How long was he doing _that_ for...? He'd shook his water can, it was almost empty. He went to refill it and actually paid some attention to what he was doing, until he went to tend to his monsters, anyway. It was a surprised that none of them attacked him for his disregard of what he was doing and how poorly he seemed to be caring for them, at the moment.

Raguna was finished with all his work and with plenty of free time to spare. He wasn't really sure how he made that possible, since to him, he seemed to not being doing any of that in such a timely fashion. He couldn't really decide what he should do to occupy his day. It was a holiday... so his brother, Ivan, would be here... Ivan was a traveling peddler, or that's what he liked to be called, anyway. Eventually, some years later, Ivan had told him about who he was and who Raguna really was. It had even crossed Raguna's mind to just leave this village, so his little... well, big secret wouldn't be found out, but he couldn't find it in him to do that. The village of Kardia looked after each other, and they had looked after him in his time of need, leaving this village or them behind would like abandoning them completely.

Raguna sighed again. What was he going to do? It was pretty lonely not to have a real significant other to confide in. He then just decided he was heading to greet his brother, since he did only get to see him once a week. Then maybe just go to church... to fill up some of those hours he had remaining, something to keep his mind off of things. He began his walk. As soon as Raguna saw Ivan he waved, with a slight smile on his. His brother was always smiling. He really did like being out and about. "Hey. Don't you love it when the weather is nice like this?" Ivan would comment. It was sunny today... not a cloud in the sky. Raguna personally didn't mind rain all that much though, it was cool and cut the heat down in the Summer time. He would nod anyway, since better weather did make work easier, though... things weren't so muddy and hard to walk through.

Raguna talked for a while longer with his brother, about different things. Like, how things were going, even though, Raguna might've stretched the truth a little when telling him, what they've been up to, just some basic things. He then would tell his brother good-bye and say that he hoped to see him next week. After that, he went to church. Wesley was in the middle of prayer, so Raguna would quietly find a seat on a pew. Maybe he should pray for something? What, though? He really didn't have something that needed to have help with... it was the opposite. He'd sigh and just listen to Wesley. After he was doing preaching, everyone had gotten up to talk to each other. Raguna was tempted just to leave, but he could say hi to them, before sneaking off.

Raguna stood up, greeting everyone individually. Everyone seemed to be in a good mood. He wasn't in the mood to chitchat himself, though. So after he had said at least one thing to everyone there, he left. He began wandering around aimlessly. Maybe he should consider finding someone just for him. But... he knew all the girls, and really had no interest in them... and he sort of knew the guys... none of them really talked too much about themselves, except they're passions and the females they were interested in. Besides, it be somewhat awkward, for both him and any guy involved. He'd sigh, still awkwardness had to be better than this.

Somehow, Raguna made it to Emmet's bar, he reluctantly entered. It was afternoon, so not only Sabrina would be in, but Lukas as well. The poet would smile and wave. From what Raguna could remember, he was getting drunk before going into the cave with Rosetta's stone... the sad part was, the cave no longer beared that stone. Raguna had accidently found it when he was going through that cave. He just never really did anything with it. A weak smile was forced on his face as he waved back. He had thought about giving that stone Lukas a couple of times, but Rosetta really didn't like him. In fact, she had told Raguna to whack him with one his tools, if he showed up at the store. Poor guy. Raguna hadn't eaten yet, so he was hungry. He went over to Emmet to see what he had on the menu, not like really ever changed over the years. He was trying to decide what to order when he felt a small tap on his shoulder. He turned around to see Lukas. "Ugh... finding the White Stone is proving so hard... it just goes to show how tough love can be," Lukas would say, then added immediately, "You've been to all the caves... and in Toros, especially. Maybe you could help me find it. You're an adventurer after all, so you might have better luck than me." A smile still was on his face. Was he serious? Raguna was unsure of what to say. He definitely couldn't just tell him yes. It'd be wasting both their time looking a for a stone that wasn't even there anymore, but then, there was the fact he had the stone for so many years and didn't bring it to anyone's attention, and Rosetta... would he really give something like that to guy she had no interest in?

Raguna rubbed the back of his head. "Uh... I... don't know... I think if I did have a chance at finding it, I would've already found it," he'd answer. It wasn't a lie, since he _did_ already find it, but it wasn't really the truth either, since he never admitted to having it. Lukas would only sigh. "Yeah... I know. It's like the fates from above are conspiring against it being found," he replied slightly down. Raguna couldn't help but feel sorry for him, he really did have his heart set on Rosetta, it was shame that she didn't feel the same way... actually, when he thought about it, none of the girls seemed to show any interest in the guys that liked them. He'd pat the poor poet on the back lightly, before remembering that he still had wanted to get something to eat. He'd hastily order something random and ate it in silence. At some point, Lukas had left his side and the bar all together, out look for his love's stone.

Raguna still had some of a day left, it was early evening, so he headed to the library. Some reading might do him some good. When entered the library, Russell greeted him with a "Good evening" and go back to what he was doing. Raguna would go to a shelf further back in the library. Normally, spells would be found there, but since he was the only that seemed to ever read those books and had gotten all the copies, Russell decided to just add some other books, as well. Raguna glanced through the books and different genres, but found it odd that there still was magic books... maybe Russell had figured someone still might want to read those. At any rate, Raguna would take some books off the shelf, just to look them over. That's when he noticed some other books... some behind the ones he taking out. Their back of the covers were facing him, so he couldn't clearly read them... it was like someone was trying to hide them. He gently put down the books he had, and reached for one with the back facing. He turned it over to read the cover.

Raguna would blink a couple of times. The title was strange and unfamiliar to him. What kind of book was this, anyway? His curiousity got the better of him, and he flipped through some of the pages. As he was doing this, his face was becoming bright red, it was extremely apparant what kind books these were... no wonder they were hidden. If the children got ahold of this kind of... of novel. This erotica was definitely not for children, but he just couldn't imagine Russell ever putting this on his shelves. He quickly shoved it back, backwards on the shelf, then just as quickly replaced the books that were hiding it. Who the hell was reading that? Some one obviously with an interest in it. It had to have been a girl though... because of what he read, it just didn't seem likely to be guy. Not with what was happening in that book. If it was girl from here though, he really misjudged one of the girls. Maybe there was more to them than Raguna had thought... either way, he headed back home. It was one of few places left to relax, and so, for the rest of the evening, he stayed at home, trying to figure out who's books those were. At least it kept his mind off other stuff, enough for him to actually have a peaceful sleep. Something he hadn't had for a long time.

Okay! Chapter 2 is finished! Huzzah. Someone have a heart attack, because I seriously thought I might end up neglecting it, like I did with the first. :D Comments please! Also, his secret is... Heh, sorry. I am unable to reveal such, yet. XD


End file.
